Interrupting is a Necessity

Today I had an opportunity to interrupt a conversation taking place at my Dad's house between my stepmother and a woman who was helping with a large yard project.  The discussion about COVID was the beginning, but it quickly moved onto Black Lives Matter.  I was concerned, but wanted to see where things were going.

Things I heard before I joined the conversation:

• (re: COVID: We aren't wearing masks - I want my kids to be able to breathe)
• I tried not to roll my eyes....and said I choose to follow what the experts are saying.
• What is just Black Lives Matter?  Don't all lives matter?
• I cringed.
• I'm not a racist.
• I cringed and physically winced.
• Brown lives matter, yellow lives matter, all lives matter....
• I interrupted.....

Me: 

The reason we say Black Lives Matter is because there is a disproportionate rate at which Black men, women, and children are killed at the hands of the police.  Black Lives Matter is a movement that has spread across the country to keep racial disparities at the front of our discussions and create sustainable action to make changes to systemic racism.  If Black lives really mattered, we wouldn't need this movement.  We are tired of seeing our Black brothers and sisters killed in the streets like animals and police officers not being held responsible for their actions.  

Woman:

Well we don't hear those things here (small town in south Idaho).

Me:

I am happy to provide some resources for you to do your own research.  We all have a responsibility to learn and know for ourselves - we can't just rely on a single source of information.  (She didn't take the information.)

Thankfully time was running out and I had to leave - but I feel that I said what I could without being rude, the woman and stepmother seemed to hear what I am saying, and I didn't lose my cool.  But the questions to myself started: Did I handle that correctly?  What should I have said that I didn't?  What could differently?  Was I accurate with my information?  Did I give too much information?  Was what I said sufficient?  

Today I learned that there is no perfect way to interrupt a conversation with a stranger and someone in your family.  There is no foolproof way to make a point without upsetting or pushing someone away.  This is messy work, there are going to be mistakes, but I can no longer remain silent and remain on the side of oppressors.  I need to strengthen these muscles, and that will only happen if I continue to engage and try to help others see another side of an issue or narrative.  I may not change minds, but I can walk away knowing that I tried and I spoke my truth and was authentic with my message.